Gravity

With apprehension
let slip these surly shackles
learn to fall skyward

Coincidence

So today the employee who expressed an interest in sleeping with the ex (while we were together) and who went to great pains to disrupt my relationship called in sick.

Three hours later I found out the ex was going to be in town today.

This week is going to be wonderful, I can tell already.

Nope, I still dont' get it.

(more whining about my social life, or lack thereof)

So I found out a few days ago that the ex (see the long stretch of whining last year) is now leaving the job she took to forward her career (or to get away from me, depending on who you talk to) and is moving home with her folks. 

A part of me wonders how she's really handling it (if things are as sunny and mellow as she indicated) and a part of me wonders if her new guy is going to end up going through the same long heartbreak I went through, or if she really did find the better prospect who will actually be able to follow her around the country while she figures out where she needs to be. 

One of my relatives asked me the other day what I felt about it, and to be honest I'm not sure what I should feel.  I guess it's one of those things I just don't get, like birthday parties for adults, or elevator music, or puppy Prozac.  I mean it's not that I don't have feelings.  I still miss her, I still think of her (though at this point I am fairly certain she doesn't feel the same about me), I can even sympathize with her for not getting the job she wanted.  But really I fail to see how my feelings have any bearing on the situation.

But then, this same relative asked, even pleaded with me not to go back to her, which in itself struck me as odd.  It's not as though she's coming back here, it's not as though she's shown any renewed interest in me, and moreover she has (in the few conversations we've had over the last year and a half) given me absolutely no indication that she would even be interested in speaking to me in person at some point in the future (much less giving the relationship another shot).  I accept this.  It took a while to get over the discomfort of it, some days I still feel it a bit, but I accept it.  And I find it odd that someone who was never a part of the relationship (who in fact didn't even really approve of it in the first place) should be so invested, or should be giving it so much thought.

The whole situation strikes me as odd.  But then I usually don't maintain contact with my ex's.  So maybe this sort of thing is normal for those who do.

'Course, it could just be that the relative in question is odd, and I don't get them... That actually makes more sense come to think of it...


Eh, fuck-it.  People are generally pretty weird (and I openly admit that I often don't 'get' them), and of course work has kept me from sleeping much these last few weeks, so they seem even weirder.

Damn strange humans.