On Politics and Gallows Humor

So 2016 is going to be one of those years I remember.


The kind of year that you don't believe is dead till it's two weeks in the ground.


There were the big things of course, the death of my father, all the extra shifts trying to keep shit together at work. 

Trying to keep my head on straight with a good three quarters of the people in my life trying to take advantage of my familial distractions.

Digging myself out of medical debt in hopes I'd be able to help my family with their debts.

Housing homeless friends.

Getting family members clear of the harder drugs.

Calling in favors, racking up favors...


And losing people.

Losing lots of people.



But right now the thing I want to remember in years to come,

(that isn't indelibly etched into my memory)

is this one sterling little cadre of coworkers.



The ones who, on November 6th (and for several months before that) told me that they couldn't wait for Hillary to win so that the ATF could "go Waco" on all of the evil cowardly poorly endowed gun owners (like me).

and who, on November 10th asked me to help them pick out firearms for home defense and tell them where they could learn how to shoot.

I wasn't the only person I know to experience this.  (living as I do in a very liberal part of the country)

but they were of the more insulting, and condescending school of social discourse,
and I find certain types of hypocrisy incredibly humorous.

Now I don't care for our president elect.

I didn't care for his competitor.

I didn't vote for either of them.

(and, contrary to popular belief, not voting for someone is not 'stealing' a vote from them... theft implies ownership and I tend to take umbrage at the prospect of being owned)

But I derive a small bit of satisfaction at seeing how the sheep on both sides of the fence change their tunes so drastically when they don't (or do) get their way. 

Spent eight years listening to it when president Obama was elected.

Spent eight years before that listing to it when president Bush was in office.

Eight years before that with president Clinton...

and so forth.

No I'm under no illusion that the next four years will be anything other than a shit-storm.

But damn if I didn't get at least one good belly laugh out of 2016

Conflagration

Snap of the fingers
         birth a small apocalypse
                  boil the morning tea

Do me no favors

Tell me no lies.

Leave.

If your hate for me is really as strong as you say, if you really feel as wronged as you claim, and it was all just pity as you told me it was so long ago.

Then go.

Don't let me be in your way.

Don't keep me around as a fallback option,
or because you want someone to kiss your ass and tell you how wonderful you are,
or so it can be my fault when you fuck up.

Just go.

Because I have more than enough folks in my life who only keep me around on the off chance that I might be useful.

Or because they want someone to blame for their shitty luck and shittier life choices.


So go.

I have finite energy, finite resources, and a more than sufficient number of people who are only friends when it's convenient for them.

And contrary to what you seem to think, I've not once interfered since you said goodbye.

Publically and privately I've always spoken your praises (even the ones I know or suspect to be false). 

And while your family may never have approved of me, may have thought I was useless and unworthy, mine could smell the smug condescension coming off of you and yours from the beginning, even when I could not...   And they have opened my eyes.

So go if you want to go.

Drop the snide emails.

Cease the vaguely titled rants and barely disguised jabs on social media.

Quit going on craigslist and posting rants about how horrible I am.

Tell your new fuck buddy to quit calling me all hours of the day and night like an amateur.

Just go.

Say goodbye.

Own it.

And go...



Don't think that you're going to hurt me by walking away.

The time for that has past.

Just go.


And when you go bragging to your little circle about how tough you are for dicking me around,
just keep in mind that if you tried to live any given year of my life, it would fucking kill you... 

You couldn't even last through the good times.